Below is a real live (real internet?) chat between me and Jesslyn
, which, besides proving indisputably that we are REAL LIVE (internet?) FRIENDS, raises some very good points.
Jesslyn: hey becca rose
i loved your blog post from this weekend
it made me laugh
me: thanks. i liked yours a lot too
Jesslyn: i also know exactly what you mean about the sexy man van
10:20 AM me: yeah?
Jesslyn: if i had a nickel for every sexy man van i wanted to ride in and then cried because i didn’t
well, i’d have at least 25 cents
me: that”s a lot of road trips
10:21 AM Jesslyn: i’m 33
if i got pregnant with twins right now, it would be considered a “geriatric pregnancy”
i’m been around the block
10:22 AM me: geriatric pregnancy? you’re making my bioclock nervious
Jesslyn: yeah–my bioclock isfeeling kind of wounded
Jesslyn: i heard that this weekend and was like “waahhht?”
i wanted them to take it back
10:23 AM but obstetrics is so awful
they called my cervix “incompetent” at one point
me: medical terminology about lady stuff is from the dark ages.
Jesslyn: it’s horrible
me: incompetent cervixes, vaginal discharge
10:24 AM Jesslyn: it’s like they’re talking about a waste water treatment plant
A) Gynocological terminology sucks.
B) Jesslyn is one funny lady.
C) My math skills are kind of like gyno terms: I thought 25 cents was 25 nickels.
D) Sexy man van rides are, like gyno terms, much cried over.
Anyhow, this Saturday, when I was tired of being sad about man vans, I went to the Tractor Tavern
with my friend Rebecca Rose. Let me tell you about the Tractor. If I had to pick an establishment in Seattle where my life happens, that would be it. The Tractor is where I met my ex-boyfriend (we were square-dancing), where I snuck in to see the Avett Brothers right before they got too big for their britches, where I’ve seen most of the music I’ve seen in Seattle, where my parents used to go on dates when I was a kid, and one of the places in Seattle where I look around and say, these are my people: I can live in this town.
I go to the Tractor often enough, I watch the bathroom graffiti conversations evolve.
So there I was with Rebecca, who is basically the extended version of me, since she’s a head taller and her name is the same but longer. We even look kind of alike (sitting down), and we both go to the same hairstylist
. But that is because I copied Rebecca because I like her hair. Anyhow, Rebecca and I and our hair got to see Zoe Muth sing this song:
If Jesslyn ever gets that 25 cents, she should give it to Rebecca because Jesslyn likes Ethereal Lady Jams
and even very sexy mans in their vans do not. Maybe this is why Jesslyn’s husband Bryan, who is a real live rockstar (though not as much of an internet rockstar as our friend Hank), drives a plain old car.